Resolutions

Professional
1. Keep up with paper grading/reading/etc. in a more timely fashion
2. Get six articles out under review before 2009
3. Get at least one paper submitted, accepted and present at PME
4. Write at least one grant
5. Renew my NBPTS certificate

Personal
1. Go whitewater kayaking
2. Buy a sea kayak and kayak all summer
3. Ride my mountain bike at least once a week
4. Exercise 3-5 times each week
5. Drink more water
6. Stop swearing (so much)
7. Ride the bus more

Roommates

Holy cow, no one told me that trying to find a roommate was going to bring out every crazy person in the Pacific Northwest. I considered myself a tolerant person, able to live with anyone. Okay, maybe not so much anymore. Who ARE these people? I think I would have had better luck placing an ad in the Stranger than trying to find a roommate on Craigslist.

I didn't think asking for a SANE, drug free, and employed roommate was going to be too much to ask. Okay, maybe I also wanted someone that wouldn't throw keg parties, have significant others sleeping over every night, or be kleptomaniacs.

Okay maybe I WAS asking too much...

Pearls of Wisdom

It is so funny how if we let ourselves be open for it, we see that pearls of wisdom are cast before us and not necessarily from the places we expect. Several people have commented to me on my marriage ending and given me great insight that I hadn't considered before. Thanks to all my friends for helping me through this time. Some of the wonderful things they are showing me:

1. I was feeling sorry for myself and lonely. My friend mentioned to me that her husband was sitting right next to her and yet she was still lonely as hell. That made me consider how long I have been an "alone" married person.

2. Another friend reminded me that I can not assume the role of the victim or the cause, that it just happens. Assuming either of those roles is not healthy or productive for anyone. Sometimes people just don't grow at the same speed. When that happens, they grow apart. It isn't anyone's fault.

3. There ARE opportunities for the future. I just need to allow that I CAN be happy, I am allowed and I deserve it. Now if it just wasn't so overwhelmingly scary.

The question that remains...can I rise above it, can I be the person that I am meant to be? Can I allow myself to be happy and take all the wonderful opportunities that are before me or will I run away from life like the scared person I always think I am? Can we really change how we think and believe? Is it as simple as trying? We are going to see...

Thanks everyone! Tomorrow, I will post the New Year's goals :-). I figure if I put them out there, I will have lots of people checking and making me accountable.

Holidays Rain and Seattle Musings

It has been awhile since I have posted here. I just haven't been in the mood to write. Between my marriage ending, the end of the quarter, the rain, the holidays, etc. I have just been too stuck in my own misery. But things are starting to even out finally.

My friend from Ghana is here. He is so funny. So many things that he says about Seattle mirror my impressions of it. He also made a couple of observations about it being good for me. The school that I am at and the area as a whole as being what I have needed. Hmm...

But the greatest thing so far...he is really smart but I got to show him something he didn't know: Google Docs and Skype as collaboration tools. :-)

The Early Years...

People have strange ideas here...

People here have strange ideas about things. They are friends with anyone, male with female, young with old, etc. They actually just like talking with each other about things like current events, politics, etc. And anyone can have any opinion they want as long as you are willing to listen to another point of view and defend your position. But what is really cool is that even if you are a WOMAN, you can have an opinion and ideas and men will actually listen to you.

So even though I have struggled to make friends here, I haven't really felt as alone because I have been accepted for who I really am, not for the persona of the "perfect southern lady".

Of course, a place that publishes a weekly like the "Stranger" would be expected to have people with "strange" ideas :-).

Ya'll

I drove to Tacoma this morning to teach a class. The sun was just rising, the mountains were out and Rainier was looming on the horizon with streaks of red of the rising sun around it. I don't understand how thousands of people can ride by that sight every day and not be totally awed, humbled and have their breath just taken away. I could not help but glory in the majesty that is our planet.

A Tacoma student said something to me that struck me about the way I have thinking...I was talking and kept saying you all when speaking of the pacific northwest. He corrected me and we all. He said that "all you all is really all WE all, because you (speaking of me) is one of we now". I really haven't been thinking of it like that yet. Maybe that needs some more comtemplation. Maybe part of my problem is not yet feeling like I am "one of us" here in the northwest. I still feel like one of "them", i.e. from some place else.